A few weeks ago some beloved family members came to visit from out of town. It was spring break and they were eager to meet our baby and catch up after an eventful year. We have such a blast when we’re all together: we laugh, tell stories, share memories, and learn more about our roots with every visit. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does the time is worth more than gold.

God really does a precious thing with families, doesn’t He?

We spent most of their trip visiting the sites in San Antonio and hanging out at my parents’ house since they have more space to accommodate a big group. For one evening, though, we had everyone over to our home for dinner so they could see our one-year-old in her element and experience a bit of how we live.

My uncle toured the first floor of our home— which we spent hours tidying and cleaning even though it looked like we did NOTHING. He looked around, took everything in, and then said something that stung a little. He was just being matter-of-fact and meant absolutely nothing by it, but to a busy, tired momma juggling an almost-toddler, running a business, and managing a household, his innocent words said A LOT.

“So basically your house is set up for kids and pets.”

Yup. Yep. Yes…. I guess it is. (Cue the lighthearted chuckle and the big “I’m totally fine with that conclusion” smile.) It’s true, after all. The heart of my home is focused around our family.

We moved on to enjoy a fun evening and a delicious meal, but I’ll admit I found myself mulling it all over for the next few weeks.

My first instinct was to paint a sign. (Imagine that.) You know, the one that says:

“Please excuse the mess. My children are making memories.”

But really this has nothing to do with my sweet uncle who, more than anything, was probably reminiscing about the days when his kids were little. No, the sting of his observation revealed something deeper in me. And maybe you can relate, too.

Some days I really feel like, no matter how early I get up, or how hard I try, or how organized I strive to be, I just can’t keep up with it all. I wonder how these other moms seems to juggle everything so well. I know they’re not perfect, but for goodness sake, their pantry sure is! While I’m passionately enjoying the ride of motherhood, it’s exposing my tendency toward perfection and self-flagellation. 😉 And at times, I’m feeling altogether inadequate.

I’ll admit– I never expected to one day have a diaper changing station in my formal living room, or to completely change out my dining room for a play room, or to literally have toys and other baby paraphernalia everywhere. But my little girl came along and all of my plans went out the window. All of a sudden, the idea of making space for her in every room of our home and our hearts became natural. (And let’s be honest—NECESSARY.)

I KNOW the most important thing is to prioritize time and energy for my daughter over the mounds of laundry and sink full of dishes. I KNOW that a home filled with love and affection far exceeds one that is immaculate. I KNOW that God will help me catch up on work when she’s decided not to sleep for days. But sometimes I still FEEL like I’m not cutting it. The never-ending chores, mess, and to-do list just seems to multiply as the days fly by. I wonder if I’m missing something.

Here’s why I’m saying all of this… I know you probably feel the same way sometimes.

The truth is— although, for the next several years, we’re going to be exhausted, and the to-do list isn’t going anywhere, and until about 2030 our homes will be set up for kids and pets… it’s a beautiful season. It’s worth it. And the fact that Better Homes and Gardens won’t be coming for a photo shoot any time soon is so totally OK.

I want to make you a promise— from one mom to another.

I will not judge your home. Ever.

It doesn’t reflect who you are, how you are, what kind of mom you are, how lazy you are, what your personality type is, how responsible you are… it just doesn’t.

What I’m going to notice is that extra book you read your daughter before naptime and how sometimes you hold her and rock her to sleep rather than take that time for yourself. My heart is warmed by the moments you spend on the floor in a tickle fight with your son because he’s a boy and he feels so loved when you’re active with him. I’m absolutely touched by that extra hour you stay up some nights to rub your husband’s shoulders and watch something pointless on TV just to let him know he’s your number 1.

It’s OK for us to release the expectations for the Pinterest perfect kitchen and the neatly organized Container Store playroom.

What do you say? Have we got a deal? I won’t judge your home and I guess I’ll ease up on myself, too.

I’m going to love on my family the best way I know how and allow myself to be OK with the rest, and you are invited to do the same. Messes and impossible to-do list and all.

Because while our houses may be a mess, we, my dear are not. In fact, I’d say we’ve got our priorities perfectly in order.

And just for the record, I still painted the sign. 🙂 What can I say, it’s therapy!

All my love,

OTHER POSTS YOU MIGHT LIKE: