A Peaceful Home is made up of three key ingredients: 1) Your relationship with God, 2) Your relationships with others, and 3) The environment you create to live in. As you pursue your list of New Years’ Resolutions for 2016, don’t miss out on these 7 POWERFUL goals you can set as a family.
1) Spend One Night Per Week Together in the Word.
There’s something about getting in the presence of God that can sort out more in our relationships than we ever could by ourselves. It’s no surprise, really, since God promises:
“For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them.” –Matthew 18:20
It’s easy to find time to watch a favorite TV show, tune in for the big game, or (especially teenagers) live with our ear buds plugged in. In 2016, I challenge you to take one night per week and make time to work on your relationship with God TOGETHER. It will increase your faith, build intimacy in your family, and fill every member up with the Word of God that does not return void. Only GOOD THINGS can come of this. Depending on the ages of your children, this can work in various ways. Here are some practical suggestions:
-Use the Bible Gateway website or app to find a topical study, reading plan, or devotional. This tool makes it SO easy!
-Read a chapter of the bible aloud to the group and discuss it as a family.
*Suggestion: Start with the book of John
-Watch a sermon as a group and discuss.
This works great with babies and small children who can’t necessarily participate yet and make it hard for parents to be 100% focused. My husband and I either plug in a DVD sermon we have in our video library our find one of our favorite teachers on YouTube.
-Pick a bible study to complete as a family.
There are great choices at Family Christian Store, Lifeway, Barnes & Noble, and LOTS of them online.
2) Never Go to Bed Upset with Each Other.
This phrase has become a bit of a cliché used at weddings, but for good reason! This practice makes a difference and is a command from God.
“Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath…” –Ephesians 4:26
Ask all of the members of your family to commit that if issues arise (and they will), the individuals involved will talk things out instead of letting them fester. Some people need to “cool off” after a disagreement occurs, and there’s nothing wrong with that per se, but if it goes overnight or longer, the bible says that it will give way to a root of bitterness. Help each other with this! When we have hurt feelings or anger, it’s natural to try and withdraw to lick our wounds. When it becomes apparent that there is a rift between one or more members of the family, call a timeout and help facilitate discussion, forgiveness, and reconciliation.
3) Challenge Each Other to Grow
The bible says: “Where there is no vision, the people perish…” –Proverbs 29:18
This is one of the reasons that New Years’ Resolutions and written goals can be SO POWERFUL. Teach your children to always strive for new levels and groom humility into their hearts by encouraging them to examine themselves. We ALL have places we need to grow—but it takes a Godly attitude to admit them and choose to decisively work on them.
Plan a family meeting where everyone can discuss and share the areas within themselves that they want to improve upon (including parents!) and then hold each other accountable over the next several months.
TIP: Lead by example and focus your efforts more on encouraging POSITIVE strides over calling out slip-ups. Look for progress, not perfection.
4) Plan a Family Fast
Traditionally a New Years’ Fast will follow a special diet plan such as Susan Gregory’s The Daniel Fast. This can be a great health reset AND an opportunity to draw nearer to God.
Other options to consider might be fasting a certain habit, form of entertainment, or activity. Spend time in prayer and ask God what you might need a break from and then have a family discussion to brainstorm ideas as a group.
If everyone watches hours upon hours of TV every day, that might be the perfect thing to fast. Or, try switching out what you normally watch and substitute a sermon or Christian film. If secular music is always on, try substituting KLove, worship music, or instrumental music for 30 days. If everyone drinks lots of soda, get it out of the house and drink water for a month.
In a time when idolatry is rampant in our culture, it’s a good practice to test and cleanse our hearts by giving something up for our God. The rewards will outweigh the sacrifice and the whole family will ultimately draw closer to each other and God.
5) Eat Together.
It always makes me sad that regular family meals have become the exception instead of the norm. Activities, deadlines, and entertainment have drawn us away from the family table and scattered us to the winds.
This year, set a practical family goal to spend AT LEAST one meal a week together as a family. Cook a meal at home, eat together, and talk to each other. No cell phones. No TV. No earbuds. Just the pleasure of each other’s company. It might be a little quiet at first, but make this a habit and the whole family will look forward to these evenings.
TIP: Parents, this is a very helpful article chalk full of conversation starters that you can use to get your kiddos talking: http://ow.ly/WIWot
6) Declutter.
Designate a cleaning day when the whole family will work together to declutter your home. These days we have SO MUCH STUFF and it’s healthy to purge it every once in a while. Not only will the house be neat(er) and tidy(er), but everyone will feel accomplished and perhaps someone who needs the stuff more than you will be blessed by extension!
“Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.” –Luke 6:38
7) Get Connected.
For a family that places a high priority on their relationship with God, building community with other people of faith is a MUST. It’s important that you go to church together AND plug in to a social group or home group together. I’m the first to admit it’s not easy. Building new relationships can be a challenge and making the time can be a challenge, but amazing things happen when we make the effort.
YES. There will differences of opinion.
YES. People (sometimes especially church people) can be difficult, but I challenge you to search until you find your tribe. It will be good for everyone.
Friends that share your faith will help hold you accountable, be an example to your children, strengthen your commitment to God, and stand by your side during the bad times and good. You may not find the right bunch immediately, but keep looking and praying until you do.
The Word says:
“Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching.” –Hebrews 10:25
I am praying for such a blessed and prosperous 2016 for you and I can’t wait to hear your stories and testimonies after implementing one, some, or all of these resolutions! A peaceful home doesn’t happen by chance, but it’s worth the prayer, choices, and hard work.
Friend, it’s time to make time… your peaceful home starts NOW. <3
What would you add to this list?? I can’t wait to hear your insights!
